:u) and other stuff

I am feeling good right now.

I received the phone call, the coveted phone call, for MX this afternoon and for the call being perfect, they gave me a $25 visa gift card (Good, now I have gas for my car next week)!! The gift card was a surprise.

And, even though I am dirt poor at this moment I am still moving forward with my plans to pay for a hotel room tomorrow for Greg and me. After the emotional roller coaster I've been through this week, I need some alone time with Greg and no one else (meaning no roommates or baby). Not that Greg and I have any intimacy issues or such, it's just that we haven't been alone 'alone' since I moved into the townhouse and this hotel time is severely over due.

Greg has told me that he's in love with me. He told me on Wednesday during a conversation about the 'issue' that was bothering me. I didn't acknowledge it at the time, but last night I called him and thanked him for telling me, among other things... (we had a little 'issue' last night on the phone as well). This week, I've felt differently and not in a positive way. I haven't thought negative things like before, I just didn't feel happy. I've noticed that since being on birth control, my emotions and feelings have been all over the place and I am not enjoying this. Granted, I've only been taking birth control for 2 months and all and I probably need to give it more time for me to adjust but I honestly hate how I get at times. I hate how it brings me down for now apparent reason. I hate feeling negative and depressed. I'm a happy go lucky person! I have many things to be happy about; such as: a job, a car, a very supportive boyfriend, a very supportive family, friends, a bank account that is still in the positive (for now), a healthy baby that didn't receive any prenatal care (except for the last 4 weeks), and other things. There are other people out there that have less than me, even though I don't know how they feel. But, even though I have all these 'good things', I am still fighting to survive and keep things in the positive (especially the bank account) and I know there is no way I would be where I am without Greg's help (and more than just financially).

UGH! There are so many things running through my mind; I can't organize them and put them down to comprehend what they are and mean!