It has begun...

... tomorrow is THE DAY...

Last night, there was an email from The Condo Guy, confirming the meeting tomorrow and suggesting a time for us to meet (eight o'clock pm). I haven't replied, yet. I am in the progress of that task (among many others)...

Last night, Greg and I were so drained of energy. We were both confused as to why we felt to exhausted. But there were a couple highlights for the night:

Amelia and Greg got into a dispute... over... the spoon. Yes, Amelia has begun to take the spoon away and try to feed herself and WILL NOT allow you to take the spoon back unless you pry her sticky, wet, fingers away from the spoon, to which she will began to scream at the top of her lungs in protest. Wow. Last night, feeding Amelia, was interesting to say the least

I learned that Greg has begun thinking about proposing to me; he's already thought about his wording, the location, the time, and the ring. !!!!!!! This excites me to no end. And, what causes this utmost extreme excitement is that I have absolutely no idea what the ring is going to look like or when and where which means it's all a complete surprise; every bit of it (I have no idea what style ring (cut of the diamond, etc), if the ring is going to be gold, white gold, or platinum, etc). This tickles me pink with joy

It has been so busy at work. I am already getting frustrated and that isn't good. Oy, they need to hire more people and soon (for example, my referral). But, at least it's a short week for me AND I will be working a half day tomorrow, rather than a whole day and taking Friday off (which I am still going to do).

Have I mentioned how excited I am about what's about to happen? I am starting a whole new life (sorta). I am as excited as humanly possible yet scared shit less. What scares me is the finances (remember, Money is the root of evil and can ruin any and all relationships), Greg believes that we will be fine financially, but I am not feeling the belief. I guess, in a sense, I am still thinking about the relationship I had with Adam and when we first moved in together and all that ensued afterwards. But, to be fair, Greg has never been fired and has been at the same company for six years and then some; whereas Adam was constantly loosing his job which made the finances difficult, and I guess I am afraid of a repeat even though Greg is very secure in his job. GGGRRRR.

It's funny how Greg and I are worried about completely different things regaurding this move. I feel his worry is nothing (even though I can't mention it here) to really worry about because he hasn't had any issues with the place he's at now; and he feels my worry about the finances is petty since we both have jobs that pay very well. To each their own.

*** FF to 2:47pm ***

Ugh, I can't get over how busy I've been this week! Thank goodness it's a short week for me. I am feeling so frustrated, stressed, and over all not in a good mood; which i've expressed to Greg (to give him a heads up for tonight).

And, again, I've forgotten about the topics of discussion. God, I would suck in a book club group and had to host a meeting. My mind can not stay focused on anything now a days. I swear I have Adult ADD.

Wish me luck that I survive the rest of the day!

A Moment to Myself!

Can you believe that I am all alone (well, Amelia is asleep at the moment) for the first time in a lllooonnnggg time? Yeah, it's so freaking nice. Greg had to run into work for about an hour and his Mom and brother Ken are out and about; so it's just me and Flickr. I love Flickr; though we're having a 'fight' at the moment (won't let me do a mass upload so I have to upload every single picture manually).

This weekend was fast and Great!

I honestly don't remember what happened on Friday after work...

Saturday was a busy day! Greg and I headed down to Waldorf at 1pm and the drive was probably one of the most scariest drives I've ever driven only because there were so many accidents that happened on 95 and 495, one of which I witnessed as it happened right behind me and freaked me out. This accident occurred on 495 and I am going to assume the funeral procession that was going on the opposite side of 495 distracted someone because the next thing I saw was a cloud of dust and then this blue car spinning all over the place in the middle of 495; it was like a scene out of a movie. I had such an adrenaline rush watching it and I nearly stopped to get out of the car to help (First Responder classes kicking in) but I didn't want to risk getting hit myself since I was sure it would have been a multi car accident.

We finally made it to Waldorf around 2:30 and met Mom at The Buffet where Amelia was waiting for us. Greg and I were in such a shock when we saw Amelia because Mom had her all dressed in jeans and a cute top and 2 little pig tails in her hair!! Amelia looked so much older than 7 months; it totally freaked Greg and I. We were like, 'where's our little girl?'.

After lunch, we headed over to April's and hung out for about an hour and on the way home, my girlfriend Michele called because she was in town (she lives in Hagerstown) and wanted to get together. We ended up meeting her at the Wal-Mart at Arundel Mills Mall since Greg and I had to get some diapers and we wanted to look at some condo things. It was nice to see Michele, I haven't seen her since March.

It was about 8pm when Greg and I made it home and Amelia didn't go to bed until 9!

Today, Sunday, Greg and I hung out at the apartment for a while; delaying the inevitable: Greg going to work on a Sunday. We finally left a little after 2pm, drove by his job and there were too many people there, so we went to Giant to get some more juice and cookies (damn cycle made me eat the rest of the Chips Ahoy!) and then to Staples where we bought a receipt book for the babysitter (in order to get my money back, I need the babysitters signature as proof of payment) and then to Target. I was surprised Greg and I only spent $50 at Target; I was expecting our total to me much higher since we picked up a huge box of Pampers, wipes, bottles, nipples, and other small items for Amelia. But, I'm not complaining.

Well, to conclude this entry, please enjoy this clip of Amelia eating her Peas and Toes for dinner last night:

So Much Going On!

Wow, this weekend went by way too fast!

Friday night, Pat (Greg's middle brother) left for the military. Greg and Ken (Greg's youngest brother) stayed up until 2am with Pat helping him pack and just hanging out together (I slept). Pat is going to be gone for a little over a year. Greg wrote this really nice letter to Pat to read and keep around. Greg let me read it and he asked for my opinion and such. It was really sweet and it came from Greg's heart.

On Saturday, Greg and I head down to Nanjemoy to visit Amelia (because we are really missing her) and my Cousin April who just had her baby girl, Olivia. On the way down, just before we reached 495, Van calls to tell me that Mom's car broke down (with Amelia in it) on one of the back roads and she has no cell reception (Now, you may be wondering how we found out about the car; well a stranger stopped and helped Momma and Momma was able to use the strangers cell phone to call for police and to call Van). Greg and I were still about an hour away when we received the phone call; so I called Sean, who was on his way down as well, to see if he was any closer but he wasn't. We were pretty much neck and neck with each other, even though he was taking 301 down and I was taking 495 to 5. It was a little before 2pm by the time we make it to the area that Mom broke down, but Sean and I couldn't find her! We don't know the back roads as well as Mom and Van and I was getting worried about the safety of Mom and Amelia. Finally, Mom calls me from her home to tell me that the police guy took her home and that the car was towed there as well. Now, here's what happened to Mom's car: THE ENTIRE WHEEL/TIRE FELL COMPLETELY OFF THE CAR WHILE IN MOTION! She didn't have a flat tire; the whole tire, rim, everything came off. Yeah, I know. How the hell does a tire fall off a car? We're still baffled ourselves. But, Mom and Amelia are safe and unharmed and that's all that matters. By the time I make it to Mom's house, it's nearly 2:30. Greg and I walk in to find Amelia fast asleep, to our disappointment. I wanted to hold her, hug her, and play with her! I let her sleep a little more (like 5 minutes) and decided to wake her. She wasn't too happy about that, in the beginning, but within a few minutes she was all smiles and laughing! Oh, I missed her so much!! As did Greg. She looked taller too. I swear she's going to be all legs when she gets older. Sean arrived a few minutes after Greg and I and we hung out while waiting for the visiting hours to resume at the hospital (they don't allow visitors from 2-4). I believe it was about 5pm when we all arrived at the hospital and met Olivia. Poor Greg, he had to wait in the waiting room with Amelia because the hospital wouldn't allow anyone under 13 to visit patients unless it was direct kin or something. We stayed about an hour and headed off to the store to get more formula for Mom and then headed home where we had a great meal cooked on the grill.

Amelia is eating a lot better now a days! She's learned how to eat off a spoon and really enjoys the new variety! She nearly ate all the sweet potatoes I fed her on Saturday night! So far, she doesn't like Peas and Apples.

Sunday was a pretty lazy day. I woke up before 8am and took care of Amelia while Greg slept in a little longer (yep, Greg and I spent the night at my Moms and slept on a very uncomfortable sofa bed). Not too long after, Mom came out into the living room and we just chatted and what not. Greg woke up around 9:30 and we all chatted and played with Amelia until she fell asleep (which she was so resisting to do) on me. Greg took a lot of pictures of all the Hummingbirds, Finches, and critters around Mom's over the weekend; which he's placed on his Flickr account. Greg is really starting to take some amazing pictures. I'll post a few of my favorite later...

Greg and I left Mom's a little after 4pm and as soon as we reached Waldorf, we were in a severe thunder storm! The rain was insane, it was blowing in all directions and the thunder was amazing; at times, the thunder was so loud, the car vibrated so much it felt like something was coming out of the ground! It was cool and scary at the same time. By the time we reached 5, it was all over. The drive home was uneventful (aside from the storm). We reach Super Fresh around 6, pick up a few items for the week (lunch and dinner) and we're home by 7. Nothing exciting happened after that. Greg and I went to bed pretty early since neither of us slept well at Moms and that was it.

Today, Greg and I are going to meet up during the lunch hour and open up our joint account. Greg has had it with his current bank; all they do is tick him off now a days. He's so happy to be getting rid of them.

The Condo Guy sent me an email over the weekend with a copy of the lease we signed and the check has cleared, so things are looking good for our move next week!! I'm starting to get excited, again, but I am still a little hesitant of the excitement (for fear of what happened last time). Last night, Greg and I started to talk about things that we need (not want) for the condo. Tonight, we're going to make a list. This morning, I was thinking about Amelia's room and thought that I might need a changing table for her; since I've always changed her on the bed but now that she'll have her own room... And, Greg and I are thinking fo things we'll need for the bathrooms and kitchen and so much more! I wish I didn't have to pay this stupid deductable because we would have so much extra money to buy everything that we need without a second thought. Another thought that I've been having is our housewarming party and who to invite! There are so many people that I want to invite, but Greg wants to keep it low-key. We'll see what happens...

This week feels good; or maybe today does. I don't know, but in any case I've got that 'good things are going to happen' feeling in my stomach. Who knows, maybe my car is ready and I can get it back (I really dislike the Cobalt; the speakers suck). Who knows, but I am enjoying this feeling for the moment.

General Discussion

This post is going to be about everything in General.

Last night, Greg and I had a little scare with Amelia. After we fed her, we put her to bed and she pretty much rolled over onto her stomach to go to sleep. Something she's been doing for months now. Well, last night, apparently she threw up her bottle and nearly 'drowned' in it. I don't know how to explain it, but from what I am guessing, she threw up a large puddle and, for some reason, couldn't or wouldn't move her face out of the puddle and began to 'breathe' the liquid in the puddle. Eventually, she let out this huge scream and Greg went into the bedroom and found Amelia screaming and spit up all over her face and up her nose. It took a while to calm her down and for her to fall back asleep (to which I laid her on my chest/stomach and eventually she stopped crying and fell asleep on me. I am going to assume it was hearing my heart beating and steady breathing that relaxed her). On another note, Amelia tried carrots last night and loved them! She actually swallowed more carrot than she 'gerbered' out. Greg and I were amazed!

Greg's neck/shoulder is still bothering him. Last night was probably the worst. Since he stopped by the townhouse on the way home last night, I told him to get the heating pad from the closet and bring it home. I bet he's thankful that he listened to me, because last night, when we were all home and relaxing in bed, I was able to 'pop' his entire back and shoulder. Then I showed him a few stretches I learned while working at the physical therapy clinic, to which he was able to 'pop' a few more places. In the end, his shoulder was much better, but his neck was still tight. This morning, I offered to try and 'pop' his back some more, before work, but he felt so guilty if he accepted. Greg feels that his pain is imposing on my happiness! I told him that if that were true then I wouldn't offer to help him. He's so silly.

Mom returns from her Vegas Extravaganza tonight. She hasn't told me if she's won any money or not, but I haven't really asked. I really hope she has, though. Mom had a great time at the Grand Canyon and other places that she's visited. I can't wait to see the pictures from her trip. I will more than likely upload them for her and such, to which I will also post on my Flickr account.

Greg is ready to move out. He's already stressing over the crowdedness of the place; though I don't really have any issues with being there.

I sent an email to the condo guy to 1. follow-up on our application, and 2. to pass along a message from the current townhouse owner to him. The message was only to ask him to call again; apparently the number left in her voicemail was a incorrect number. I am still crossing my fingers about this place.

This morning I had my appointment with WIC. These appointments are rather interesting, though I've only been to two so far. Today, we learned about grains. Yeah, all about grains. And, the person who was instructing the class was way too energetic for the 8:30am appointment. She was hella loud and wanted 'class participation', to which she got very little. But, I did get a nifty bowl, a cookbook, and some 'money' to spend at the farmers market. So, tomorrow my brother and I are going to attend the farmers market in Glen Burnie. After the farmers market, I am going to head to work, with Amelia, to stop by and then head down to see Mom, that is if she's still planning on watching Amelia for a few days. Greg and I are hoping she does because we would love to go to the movies. Greg is itching to see The Simpsons Movie and Harry Potter (maybe on the Harry Potter). I would like to see Hairspray because I loved the Rikki Lake version, although it's a little disappointing that the movie wasn't filmed in Baltimore, MD like the original version. But, at the same time, Greg and I shouldn't be spending money that we need to be saving.

Lately, I've been having some very strange dreams. These dreams involve someone that I've never met, in person, but I know of. For the last two nights in a row I had a dream that involved Greg's ex-fiancee. Basically, the dream involved us being at a party/house event and we both knew that we were there, yet we kept ignoring each other; even though we had a mutual friend (that wasn't Greg). It was just strange.

Well, I've been given another 'project' and I guess I should start working on it.

Until then...

Wednesday Babble

Happy Birthday, Momma!

Today is my Mom's 48th Birthday. Yeah, she's young (was 19 when she had me). My Grandma is only 67 years old; yeah, no kidding. I called my Mom this morning to wish her a happy birthday and we chatted for a bit. Talked about her Vegas Extravaganza and the birthday presents I gave her last month (Ice Tea Maker, I Love Lucy purse, and digital meat thermometer - all of which she loves) and her plans for the day (nothing special. She was just excited she found a farrier for the horse, Lucy).

Happy Birthday, Pat!

Today is Greg's brother, Pat, birthday as well. I believe he's turning 26. Pat is at some training camp in the west, I believe. Pat did call Greg last night and they chatted a bit and Greg was able to wish him a happy birthday (though, he would have forgotten if I hadn't of gone through Greg's calendar at work and marked everyone birthdays for him; what would he do without me?), but the main reason Pat called Greg was to tell him that he left milk in the refrigerator at his old apartment and to see if he could remove it before he had to turn in the keys. Eww!

Ok, now that the birthday wishes are done, let's continue with our normally scheduled program, shall we?

Last night after work, I headed over to Target to pick up the pictures I ordered on 7/12/07. I was surprised at how well they, mostly, turned out. Some were a little pixel-lated whereas others you couldn't tell if was from a 'normal' camera or digital. So, with my mind on Scrap booking, I decided to look at scrap booking stuff. Oy! So much to choose from! But, I did well and didn't buy anything... until... I walked towards the end of the isle, where they usually place their clearance items and saw what I've been wanting to buy since Amelia was born: A Memory Book; you know, the ones where you save pictures of their first hair cut, first Christmas and Halloween, First day of school, etc. The book was on clearance for..... $4.98!!! Yeah, that's all! So, I HAD to buy it (especially since the cheapest I've seen was about $20 at Babies-R-Us or the Hallmark store). It was a no brainer for me. Then, I walked down some more isles to see if I could find anything interesting for dinner, I didn't, but decided to buy a big jar of nuts. So, I walked out of Target only spending $11.55. I feel special.

Now, while at Target, Amelia was so giddy! She was actually laughing while in the isles! She would laugh every time I went "Boo" to her or would push the cart a little fast and then slow it down. It was so hilarious! I was tempted to call Greg and my Mom so they could hear how much she was laughing, but I couldn't keep a decent cell signal in the store. Then, I thought about recording her laugh to make it my ring tone, but I didn't want the sound of me going "Boo" to be in it. So, I wait a little longer for her to laugh at any and everything. I think it will be very soon.

I arrive home around 7:30 and take Amelia upstairs into my room and just lay on the bed with her and play. Sean comes in and lays on the bed too and plays with Amelia as well. Amelia licked Sean's nose.

Around 8pm, I put Amelia to bed (it's so cute to watch her rub her eyes...) and head down stairs to make dinner (pork chops, again). Greg arrives at 8:20, he was late (at which I told him he would be and he tried to deny that he would be late). We eat dinner and watch "America's Got Talent". Somewhere between 8:30 and 9:00, Greg goes upstairs, I didn't head up until 9:30. Greg was playing DD when I got to my room and I lied next to him and watched him play and began to give him directions on where to go and who was waiting for their food, etc. He lost. Afterwards, we laid in bed, in the dark, and talked. We did some deep talking. We talked for nearly an hour about a lot of relationship things (mainly his past relationships and the 'warning flags' that he ignored; about his best friend Jeff; and a little about our relationship and our future together). Now, mind you when I went upstairs at 9:30, it was to get a little action, if you know what I mean. So, when we started talking about relationships from the past and many of the other topics (which I won't mention here), by the time I began to change the subject, he wasn't really feeling 'it'. But, me wanting what I wanted I ended up getting it. LOL. It's a little joke that Greg and I have, between us. So, finally around 11:30, we head for sleepyland.

Today, this morning, I was late for work. Amelia and Greg were taking their sweet time getting ready! Then, I had to make lunch for Greg and me, which took nearly 20 minutes. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, I'm just writing this because it something to write about.

I arrive at work about 5 minutes late. I had my Target bag with the pictures and Memory book, as well as my new tags (which I didn't put on last night; what can I say - i was lazy), though I don't know why I brought the tags... oh wait, now I do... because I wanted to bring the registration card before it gets lost in the townhouse... duh. So, as soon as I am at my desk, I share the pictures with my supervisor, who shares them with another co-worker, finally around 10am, she brings them back to my desk and then I begin my Memory Book Extravaganza! It has been interesting and enjoyable. There are so many things I have to wait for, though. But, the book in itself is neat because I can create my own pages and add them to the book, which I think I will do in the near future. So far, the only thing I've created is the Father's Day Page, along with filling out the story of when I found out I was pregnant, her birth information, and things along that nature.

I just received the following email from my roommate, Aaron:



-----Original Message-----
From: AARON GREENFIELD [mailto:agreenfield@*********.us]
Sent: Wednesday, July 18, 2007 1:45 PM
To: Jessica D
Subject: yo

Hey cool kid. How's your day goin so far. Im ready to go home. do you wanna set off those fire works tonight?

My reply:

Sure!

Damn, you must be really bored to be sending me an email!

Anyway, I am feeling pretty energetic at the moment, though I don't' really know why. Maybe it has something to do with the skittles I ate with my lunch, but who knows.

Oh, as for yesterdays post about being focused. Yeah, I failed. I didn't even complete half of the accounts. Meh. Guess I could do it now...

I think I will start some work today...

Until then, Ciao!

Trying to Focus

Work has been a little on the slow side. Don't get me wrong, we've had our moments of extreme busy, but nothing on a regular basis.

So, to kill time, I've been reading online and such. And, now I am completely distracted.

I need to get my focus back in order. So, this morning I started working on my on-going project. The reason I stopped the project was because after nearly 2 months, I questioned to reason of this project. I never got an answer about whether to continue or not, so I stopped. Recently, like last Friday, I went to check on the grid and there were like 177 new account numbers!! So, I guess they decided to move on with the project and not tell me; this morning I started the tedious task of going through the 200+ accounts, on a idividual level, and so forth. I believe I made it through 40-ish accounts. My goal, for this afternoon, is to complete all the accounts and then to hopefully go back and call the account holders on the ones that were cancelled for the specific reason this whole project began.

Yeah, we'll see how this goal goes...

In the mean time, it is my lunch hour and I'm taking full advantage of it. I'm almost caught up on my email, I did fax the application for the condo and included additional refernces (again, going for the brownie points here), did the email 'chat' thing with Greg this morning, posted a few comments on a few regular blogs I read, and just chilled out.

Last night, Greg was unable to open a storage unit because their credit card machine was down. So, we came home and he cooked dinner while I tended to the bebah, also known as Amelia. Amelia went to bed rather early and easily. Around 7, I was holding her in my lap and she started to rub her eyes, so I placed her against my chest and she began to suck her thumb and lay her head on me. Then, every 5 seconds she would lift her head, let out a sad and pathetic cry and then lay her head back down. All I could do was laugh as she did this over and over. Eventually, I took her upstairs and laid her in the crib thingy and she pretty much went to sleep. Now, around 10:30, she was WIDE AWAKE, like playing and chatting and shrieking as if it were in the morning! This totally confused Greg and I. So, we picked her up, changed her and gave her a small bottle. She was back asleep by 11:15pm and I was too far behind her.

Today, Greg has a huge list of tasks for me! First, he's going up to Security to pick up my tags (I don't know why I thought they would be mailed to me; oh, I know why, because that would make more sense!), then try to open the storage unit, and then stop at Target to pick up the pictures I ordered last week off of Flickr.

Have I mentioned how much I like making new friends? I don't think I have, well I do. I've made a new friend! It's a long distance friendship, but should be entertaining.

Also, I have a few new regular readers! One hails from Virginia and the others are from 'across the pond' in England. Howdy!

Well, lunch is about over and I am going to work on my goal.

Have a nice day!

Jess

Thoughtful Friday

Yeah, nothing to really title this entry. I do try to keep the titles a little interesting, but some days the creative portion of my brain just isn't creative. I am going to assume for today, the creative portion is on a coffee break as I write.

Yesterday I went through my Flickr photos and selected a few, more like 27, for print. I am going to attempt this scrap booking thing. I selected photos from the first five months of Amelia's life and some of the outings we went (Cunningham Falls, O's game of Father's Day, etc) to as we all the Holidays we've had, thus far. My plan is to create a page of each 'event'. I don't when I am actually going to start this project with the move and all this weekend (for me) and next weekend (for Sean and Aaron), plus trying to save money for when ever Greg and I actually find a place to live on our own. But, on the bright side, the pictures I selected for print will only cost me $3.15 and I can go get them at the Target in Ellicott City (which I thought about picking up last night, but Greg wasn't interested in meeting me there and mentioned something about traffic being a nightmare).

Last night, I felt so... melancholy; just not with it emotionally. I spent two hours doing something I should have, even though it didn't really have an effect on me emotionally, but I was curious and such. During that two hour span, I spoke with my Mom for about 45 minutes. We chatted about the move, her trip next week to Las Vegas, the email we received from her Mom, my Grandma, about their vacation in Alaska and Canada (cruise, tours, the whole nine yards), as well as other 'girly' things. Around 10pm, we hung up; Sean and Aaron come home and I head up stairs for my shower and bed. Around 11pm, I try to call Greg but he was having cell phone difficulties and I was becoming frustrated. I felt a strong need to talk to Greg last night and his cell phone carrier was preventing us from talking. Finally, after nearly 15 minutes of attempts, I just left him a voicemail. After about 3-5 minutes of silence, Greg calls and we were able to hold a 12 minute conversation that wasn't interrupted by gargle and other non-comprehensive noises. I told Greg what I did last night and why I did it. He asked a few questions about why I did it and all; he wasn't upset or anything, but I felt like talking to him about it. Then, I asked what he did for the night and he told me that he played a little on the computer (games), consolidated one of his tubs, threw away a lot of old pictures from his last relationship, and talked to his Mom about me moving in this weekend. I asked why he threw away his old pictures and he pretty much did it for the same reasons I didn't keep my wedding pictures; one chapter closed and moving on. As for the conversation with his Mom about me moving in, she was hoping to have one more week to get ready, but if I have to move in this weekend, then I have to.

Also, last night Greg and I talked about our future wedding; just a little. I asked him if he wanted something more than a 'court house ceremony' and he said yes, which did surprise me. Then I asked what time of year would he like to marry. We didn't pick a season, but I suggested Fall for all the pretty colors. I think a winter wedding, though beautiful if there is snow, would be too risky for any type of weather related reasons for cancellation (as many birthday parties of mine were cancelled due to snow). Spring is an option as well. Summer, is too typical and can be hot. If I had to choose, I would plan a Fall wedding (10/10/09 would be possible because I'm weird and want the month and date to match, just like my birthday, 02/02); I think the temperature, outside lighting and scenery would be just right. So, it looks like Greg and I might have an actually wedding when we marry, which means I would have to plan a wedding! When Adam and I decided to wed, I did the invitations and my Mom and Grandma did the rest. There wasn't anything to really plan. I already knew I didn't want a traditional wedding, I felt it was a waste of money. So, my wedding was in Annapolis's court house and the following day, we had a BBQ at the Churchton house. Nothing special in my eyes. But, now that Greg and I are starting to talk about getting married and what not, I do want to make it special, though not extravagant. I would still rather spend the money on the honeymoon than the wedding. As of now, the honeymoon is still a 2 week European cruise. Greg has even shared this with some of his co-workers!

Sometimes, the relationship Greg and I have seems unreal. At times, I can't believe that Greg and I are actually in a relationship with each other. Don't get me wrong, I love this feeling of being in love with someone, the butterflies that he gives me when ever I see him or when he gives me a call at work. Greg, I swear, is probably one of the most amazing and caring people I've ever met. Sometimes, I wonder, when I compare the relationship I had with Adam to what I have with Greg, what was I thinking while I was with Adam? I know it's not fair to compare the two, but my feelings are night and day difference between them (comparing my feelings while with Adam vs. my feelings while with Greg). With Adam, I was in no hurry to actually marry him. We were engaged for about two years before I finally decided that we needed to either progress or move on without each other. Adam has absolutely no interested in the wedding details whatsoever. I would ask him for his opinion and he said he wasn't interested and that I could so whatever I wanted. Yet, when I would decide on something, later he would complain about some minute detail that he didn't like. Why did I marry Adam? I settled. Thus, my one life lesson to never repeat and the one thing I would change from my past if I could.

Greg, on the other hand, is someone that I can not wait to spend the rest of my life with. I can't wait until we buy our first house together and go on family vacations with Amelia (and maybe our future son or daughter) and just grow up together. Greg truly is someone I want to spend the rest of my life. And, this is something I've known, though denied myself, for a little over a year now and Greg has felt the same about me.

There was one point in time last year that I thought about 'dating' but I couldn't bring myself to actually start seeing other guys because I didn't want to 'phase' Greg out of my life. This was all before I knew I was pregnant. I was even talking to another guy and thought about meeting up with him one night in October. I told Greg about it (we were chatting via text messages) and he told me that he was feeling a bit jealous and was afraid to loose me (I did save those text messages). I've asked Greg on many occasions why he didn't tell me his feelings for me earlier and he replies that he was too afraid. Such a silly boy.

I'm not exactly sure why I've divulged myself into these thoughts. In anyevent, I am going to blame it on my cycle. But, if you think about it... at least I am not acting like a weeping girly girl, just feeling a little emotional in retrospect.

Well, I leave in a half hour to get Amelia and head over to Dr. PaPa. I am so curious to see how much Amelia weighs. I, on the other hand, am not excited about her getting shots and the mood she is in afterwards. I have a feeling Amelia will be going to bed early tonight.

Tomorrow, starts a new journey: being with Greg everyday.

Time Warp

From This:





To This:




Yep, Amelia is SIX MONTHS OLD today, as of 7:59am.

Tomorrow, we get to find out how much she weighs, her height and if we can start her on flavored Gerber foods.

Feeling Blue

Yeah, I'm not feeling any better.

I tried eating lunch, and I was successful with getting it all down, but I still feel like I'm going to be sick.

Greg has contacted the rental complex he's currently living and they have an opening in July, but we are waiting to see if he can just transfer his lease to another unit. I bet that question confused the leasing agent he spoke to!

It's interesting to see Greg being to optimistic about all that's recently happend. He's so energetic and 'gun-ho' about getting another place. I don't know where he's getting it from, but I hope it remains.

I wish Greg were coming over tonight. I don't want to be alone.

On the bright side (and yes, there is a bright side), Amelia tried her first spoon of rice cereal last night. Greg took pictures. It was interesting to say the least; and, very messy. Next time I have to remember to use a bib. Oh, and to get a baby spoon (add that to my mental list of things to get/do). I will try to post the pictures on my Flickr account tonight.

Father's Day 2007

Today was Greg's first Father's Day! Boy, did we do a lot!

First, we arrived at Bill Bateman's for their Father's Day Brunch. The food was amazingly good; well, the stuff I ate at least. Greg's only complaint was that the waffles were a little bland. Anyway, there was an amazing selection to choose from. I loaded up on the bacon for some reason; just something I have been craving lately.

After breakfast, we head over to Babies-R-Us to get Amelia a hat. The bonnet that we bought back in April is either missing or at my Mom's. So, we bought Amelia her first baseball cap. While at the store, I asked Greg if we have a boy next, is he going to buy all sports related outfits and he said "Oh yes!" emphatically. It's kinda weird to think about having another baby, but at the same time it's kinda exciting.

Once we purchased the hat, we head to the ATM for Greg and then we're off to Camden Yards for our first game of the season and Amelia's first game ever. The ride to the stadium was nice. It wasn't crowded at all and I got an amazing parking spot! When we arrived at the stadium, we picked up the tickets at will call and walked to the ticket checker stand thingy and the lady asked us if this was Amelia's first game and we said yes and then she told us that we could get a certificate to remember the day! So, that's the first thing we did once we were in the stadium. Then, we went potty. LOL Once we were all done and settled, we went to our seats and I was upset about the seats because I specifically asked for seats on the end of the row and we were 5 seats from the end, and there were people on both sides of us. Now, mind you, we have packed Amelia's diaper bag, car seat, my purse, the snugglie, and Greg's camera bag. That's a lot! Next time we go to a game, I'm just going to buy another seat to put all the stuff we carry in. Amelia did pretty well at the stadium, for a while, and then she became really fussy and irritable. She was hot and sweaty and tired. She hasn't napped much at all by this point. I tried to hold her and comfort her but she just kept screaming at the top of her lungs! Finally, Greg and I were like, 'ok, we need to get her out of here' and start to pack up. By now, it's only the second inning! And, as soon as I put Amelia in her car seat, she was out cold! So, Greg and I stayed a little longer. After about 15 minutes or so, we decided to move our seats because it was so cramped. We made it through 5 innings and decided to head home. We both got a lot of sun and we wanted to beat the crowd. Next game is going to be a evening game.

Once we made it home, we fed Amelia and placed her in the crib, then Greg and I rubbed aloe lotion on each other for the sun burns, then Greg and I lied next to each other and chatted. Much about nothing really, but it just felt good to be in his arms.

This whole weekend, Greg and I talked about our future together. We talked about goals for us, rather than a goal for him or I. One goal that we talked about is buying our first house and what we need to do to get there. We both agree that we need to improve our credit scores. The last time I checked mine was either just before Amelia was born or when I returned to work. I can't remember. And, when Greg opened up his checking account with Wachovia on Saturday, they game him his current credit score. So, we know where we stand and we've placed a goal of what number we want to achieve before we start looking for a house. We talked about how we are going to achieve this goal and how we're going to do so for each other.

This relationship with Greg is completely different than any relationship I've ever experienced. I know I've mentioned this before, but I just can't seem to get over how much happier I am with Greg. It's really like a dream or wish come true while I am with him. He's so caring, compassionate, dedicated to Amelia, loving and so many other emotions that words can not describe. Greg is always more than willing to help me, even before I ask him to do so. Even though he doesn't live with Aaron, Sean, and me, he helps clean the townhouse (like take the trash out, load and unload the dishwasher, straighten the living room, etc). When ever I am upset about something (and this happens more often than it used to), Greg always wants to talk about what's bothering me and he means it. He wants to make me happy, even if he's the reason I am upset. He tells me over and over how good our relationship is because we are so open with each other; and I agree with him. I believe what makes this relationship different and better than the ones we've experienced in the past is because 1. we're completely open and honest with each other; 2. we have the same goals in life, separate and combined; 3. we have so much in common, in all aspects of life; 4. this is real. we are not settling to appease us or for Amelia. neither one of us is giving up something to be in a relationship to have that status. everything that I feel for greg and that he feels for me is true and not because either of us feel that 'we have to'. We know the feelings are not superficial, as they have been with past relationships (on both sides), and that what we are feeling for each other is deep and not something that fades away; 5. we are not needy of one another, meaning that we both know we like time to ourselves and don't cry when one of us isn't paying attention to another. I know greg likes his gaming time and that's something I'm not going to take away from him, or have him change, just like I like my tv time or reading time. Neither one of us expects the other to give up something that we enjoy to make the other happy.

Successful Saturday

I'm amazed at how much Greg and I did today!

We left the townhouse at 10am and headed over to Wachovia in Severna Park and Greg opened a new checking account. He's going to close his account with Northwest Savings, they don't have very many branches and the ones that do exist are no where near his job or where we're going to live. We didn't open the joint account because Wachovia requires $100 to open new accounts and we didn't have $200 dollars. Plus, in order for us to receive the referral bonus, it was suggested that we open his account before the joint. So, probably next we is when we will open the joint account.

After we were done at the bank, we went to Atlanta Bread Company and had a late breakfast/early lunch. After lunch, we headed over to Target off Rt. 3 and do a little window shopping and pick up some underwear for Greg. After Target, we head over to Friendship Park (or Airport Park as I call it) and watched the planes land. Then, we head over to another spot and watch them take off. Amelia slept during this time. After watching the airplanes, we decided to go check out our new place. Turns out, I was way off on where we were located. We are at the end of the street, rather than at the beginning. Which, as its benefits since we're away from all the traffic. Plus, there is a nice pool right around the corner. I took pictures with my cell phone. Then, Amelia became a little fussy and we head for home. It was about 2:30 by the time we arrived. Once we're home, we feed Amelia, play with her for a little bit and then she takes a nap. While she's sleeping, Greg and I talk about relationship stuff. I asked him how our relationship is different from his last ones and things related. It was a very good conversation. Amelia's nap was short lived, so we get dressed and head out to Bill Bateman's for dinner. It's funny, we started our day in Severna Park and then we end the day in Severna Park. Greg was thinking the same thing as I was when I mentioned it. Dinner was good. Amelia was adorable as usual and then fell asleep. While at dinner, Bill Bateman's had a flier for a Father's Day brunch and Greg and I agree to come back first thing tomorrow morning; well, 10am when the brunch begins.

The plan for Father's Day is:

10am - Brunch at Bill Bateman's
11am - Head up to Camden Yards for the O's game (and watch them loose)
12:30pm - Try to get the baseball players to 'sign my baby'
1:35pm - The O's continue the loosing streak

and, that's all I have for now. Since the weather is going to be on the extremely warm side, we're going to see how Amelia handles the temperature.

Well, Greg wants to use the laptop, so I will finish later or tomorrow.

Video of Amelia

Isn't she the cutest!

17 Days and Counting...

I am so freaking excited about moving! Today, I've called BG&E to transfer the service to my new address, I've called my car insurance agent to remove the Pontiac from my insurance policy and am waiting for the faxed paper to sign and what not.

*~*~*~*~* Fast Forward to 4:25pm *~*~*~*~*

Today has been insanely busy, which doesn't help matters when we're short on staff.

During my lunch, I read my blog entries from this time last year on Y! 360 (which is still private, but I'm working on that) and MySpace (www.myspace.com/frye79). It's interesting to go back in time. OMG! I so remember the drama I went through with CCTA and Weis! It's hard to believe that I left Weis last June 17th. That's the day I cut my finger on one of the meat slicers. I was lucky enough not to cut it off, but I did get the tip! There was so much blood too! I even put on a size small glove to use a tourniquet to help stop the bleeding, which worked a little, but there was still some pretty significant bleeding. After a few hours, the bleeding did stop and a scab formed. I now have a scar on the tip of my finger! My finger print will never be the same. Boo-hoo. LOL

Last night, while Sean and I were cooking dinner, we were talking and he said that he wants to have a baby. I asked him if he's enjoyed having Amelia around and he said yes. Sean is also happy that we're going to be living close together after the move (practically across the parking lot). I am happy to have him around and for him to see Amelia reach her milestones.

I love listening to Amelia 'talk'. It's like she's telling a story in her words. She will babble and then shriek for joy and then babble some more. I really need to upload the video clip that Greg took yesterday morning.

Also, Amelia doesn't cry in the morning when she's hungry. On Sunday, she slept until 9:30am and that was when Greg and I woke her! We gave her a shower and then fed her and by then it's was 10:30am! Greg and I were wondering if we should be concerned about her recent sleeping and eating changes, but decided to see how she was for the rest of the day; and she was fine. Although, last night she was a sreaming terror around 6:45-7:00pm. Around 7:30, I took her upstairs and gave her some baby tylenol to help her teething pain and she feel asleep within 15 minutes and was out for the night!

Greg and I talked about opening our joint checking about with Wachovia. He wants to wait a little longer, until June 23, but I honestly can't wait that long so we're going to go to the bank this coming weekend! And, Wachovia has a promotion going on that they will give $25 for opening a new account by referral! So, if all goes well, Greg will get $25 for opening his own checking account and then I'll get $25 for referring him.

Shop, Spend, and Enjoy

Greg and I did so much today!!

Once we were up and showered and dressed, we went to Wachovia to get a money order. I decided to pay the rest of the security deposit since I had the money available. Sean and Aaron went with us to do the same. Ugh, I will never get another money order from the bank. They charged me $5 for a piece of paper!

So, once we got the money order, we went to the Pontiac to get the tag off and after that Sean and Aaron headed to the rental complex and Greg and I headed to the MVA Express in Columbia to turn in my tag. Greg and I had a small argument on the way to the MVA. We're over it now. He just didn't agree on my parking when we stopped to get the tag off the Pontiac. So, once we arrived at the MVA Express, the line was practically out the door! But, there was no line for the tag drop-off station!! And the reason why was because it was closed. Bastards! So, I had to drop off the tag in their drop box. I really didn't want to do that because I wanted my receipt to fax to my insurance agent and get the Pontiac off ASAP. Meh, I'll just wait until I get the letter in the mail.

Once we were done at the MVA Express, we headed over to the rental complex to give them the rest of the security deposit. And, to our surprise, Sean and Aaron were still there! So, we finished our business at the same time and decide to head over to Bennigan's for lunch. For the four of us, food, drinks, and alcoholic beverages, the total was $82! I was expecting over $100. I treated everyone to lunch and Sean paid the tip. While there, Amelia was the main attraction from all the female servers.

After lunch, we all headed over to Target to do a little window shopping for our up coming move. Plus, we wanted to get a teething ring for Amelia. She is growing her first tooth! We can see the little white spot on her lower gum line! Yeah, I ended u spending $110. I bought Greg his Father's Day present, a ice tea maker. Something that he's been looking for for a while. We also picked up more nooks for Amelia, salt and pepper mills, cards for Greg and Van, soda's, Reisen candies (for work) and other things that I can't think of at the moment (it's 9:00pm as I write). After Target, we went to Giant to pick up formula but they didn't have enough (I use WIC), but we picked up other items (cereal, cheese, milk, juice) with my WIC checks as well as a few other items, like watermelon! I can't wait to try the watermelon tomorrow.

Once we made it home, Greg put the stuff away while I played with Amelia. She's extremely talkative now a days. Earlier this morning, Greg recorded Amelia's babble and later I am going to post it on YouTube and put it on here for all to listen. Her talks are so adorable.

Amelia fell asleep around 6:45. She only ate 2.5 bottles today. That's not much, compared to her normal consumption. But, I think she has the same eating habit as me; little, if any, appetite when it's hot outside.

Once Amelia was asleep, Greg and I layed in bed and talked about the future and past, as well as the concern on his mind. I can't write about his concern because it's personal, at least on here. But, it could have a huge impact on our life and where we can live. His concern isn't going to make me not want to live or marry him, I know the truth of what happend. In due time, everything will be over.

Spring Cleaning!

All we, Sean, Aaron, and I, have done today is clean!

This morning, once Amelia was asleep, I ran out to Giant and picked up some cleaning supplies and products. I spent $75! Sheesh!

We've cleaned a lot of the little stuff, such as the doors, steps, walls, etc. As well as the floors, laundry, tub, etc. Just a lot to do! And, we're doing pretty good with time.

What has motivated this extensive cleaning is the landlords pending visit. We haven't talked to her since Friday. We don't even know if she is in fact coming over but we don't want to take the chance of her stopping by and the place looking like it did. I am planning on taking pictures once we're done.

Amelia has been ok, so far. I haven't been able to do much for my room because I was working on the kitchen and bathroom. So, I called Greg to see if he would watch Amelia for a few hours so I could get my stuff done and his responce was "It's my day off." He's gets a whole day to himself. I am with Amelia every single day. All I asked was for a few hours and all he could tell me what that it's his day off. What the fuck! I ended the conversation with something along the lines of something about playing his computer games and he mentioned something about the Mon Wed Fri when he's over as my days off, even though I still help him with Amelia, and I said fine and hung up on him. I was, and still am, pissed that he would rather spend all fucking day playing his precious computer games (and do his laundry, which was needed and he's been up since 9:30am and I asked him how he was on his task of things to do and he said he was fine and that is when I asked if I could drop Amelia off so I could get my tasks done) and he basically said no because he wants to play games. We only have a little more than 3 weeks to pack and clean. I want to get a head start and the only time is on the weekends. I am so angry and hurt right now. I don't plan on calling Greg at all today. I don't even know if I want to talk to him. Period.

Mindless Ramblings

It's Tuesday. I am back at work. This feels weird.

As much as I anticipated returning to work, I wasn't expecting the mind numbing slowness. Granted, this morning started off with a kick and some very argumentative people, but for the last hour or so, it's been pretty slow.

Meh.

I was late for work partly due to babysitter not answering her door when I was knocking. I swear I knocked on her door for nearly five minutes with no response. It really aggravates me when they don't hear me. I think they should invest in a door bell or something. The only good thing is that this week is a short week for babysitting needs and I will only need to pay $84. Yippie!

It feels good to be on a regular pay schedule again. Those three weeks without any money was rough! My acct ended going into the negative anyway. I was so close! But, at least my bank credits one over draft fee every 12 months, but I have to call and ask for them to do so; which I'll probably do on my lunch break.

I was reading an article online about relationships and whether weight affects a relationship. Personally speaking, I don't feel that weight loss or gain affects how a person feels for you or how you feel for them. When I met Adam, I weighed the same as I do now. During our 7 year relationship, I gained 100 pounds and he didn't say anything about it and it wasn't the cause of our divorce. Today, I weigh 100+ pounds less. I've lost weight since meeting Greg and it hasn't effected our relationship one bit either. Greg outweighs me by 110 pounds and I don't care. If he gains more weight it won't change my feelings for him and I know he feels the same for me. Now, Greg doesn't want me to loose too much weight and be like a size 5 and weigh 125 pounds because he's afraid that I would leave him for someone else, which I would never do. Besides, I don't want to weigh 125 pounds. I am happy with my current size and weight. If the weight continues to come off, so be it. I'm not actively trying to loose weight, which makes me wonder if my thyroid is acting up again. During my pregnancy, I learned that my thyroid was over active which is probably why I didn't gain any weight (which is another reason I didn't suspect that I could be pregnant) and once Amelia was born, I lost an additional 60 pounds. I haven't been to my doctors since my pneumonia and my 6 week post-delivery check-up. Once I get my new health insurance coverage, I plan on making an appointment for a complete check-up including blood work; which I hate. Even after all that I went through this past January, I still hate needles and shots. I still don't know how I was able to give myself insulin shots for that whole month of December! I actually have scars on my arm from the needles from when I was in the hospital last. On that visit, they gave me a 16 gage needle for an IV. The lower the number, the bigger the needle. 16 gage was HUGE! And, they stuck me twice because the vein collapsed on the first attempted (Gee, I wonder why; huge needle, low blood pressure, large loss of fluids... duh!) Thankfully, a different nurse did the needle on the second try and it was no where near as painful. I thanked her.

Sometimes, I still can't believe I went through all that I did in January. Yesterday, as Greg was playing with Amelia, a thought came over me: Another family could be doing the same things with her if we had gone through with putting her up for adoption. Another family would be enjoying her smiles, babbles, shreiks and shrills. But, Greg and I are the ones enjoying this. It was weird to think about that and what our life would be like without Amelia. Greg told me, earlier this month when I asked him, that he would feel guilty if we had gone through with the adoption. I've also asked him if we would still be friends if we went through with the adoption and he thinks we would. He does feel that if he we had gone through the adoption, there might have been some strain on the friendship but he thinks we would be able to support each other and get through it. I've also asked him if he would ever tell me about his feelings for me if we hadn't had Amelia and he said yes, eventually. I constantly tease him about his feelings for me. I knew he had developed them and tried to get him to tell me but he was ignoring what his heart was telling him. The teasing is all in good nature and he knows this.

I had a weird dream this morning and it made me feel guilty. It wasn't a sex dream or anything, but more of a dream about me growing feelings for another person. the dream involved Greg and I looking for a place to live (as we are currently). An old friend of mine was living in this huge townhouse and told me that there was more than enough room for us to move in. So, I met the owner of the townhouse and he and I hit it off. There were sparks flying and everything. While this guy was showing me around, he started to hold my hand and I let him. Then, we walked outside and we went behind the townhouse, sat down and began to chat. He knew I had a boyfriend, he even talked and asked questions about him. Yet, he kept holding my hand and began to lean in to kiss me when Greg appeared around the corner on a moped like bike and I could see the frustration on this other guys face. It was so weird! And, when I awoke, I had this guilty feeling in my stomach. I told Greg about the dream and he just laughed. But, the dream makes me wonder if that is something that will happen in the future and I wonder how I would react if something simular were to occur.

The hand holding in the dream, I believe was due to the hand holding Greg and I did at the carnival. Greg and I don't hold hands very often in public. We usually hold hands at night while we're sleeping or if we're at the movie theaters. But, last night Greg would reached for my hand and held it so softly. It was very romantic for me. Especially since he was making the inital contact. Sometimes, while Greg and I are at a store or what not, I will go for his hand, but not very often. Usually, I just rub or run my fingers dow his back or play with his butt, which annoys him but I continue to do it anyway.

Have I mentioned how much I love my Flickr Pro account? I love Flickr to begin with! I check it constantly throughout the day to see how many views my pictures have received. At last look, I was at 621 views for 469 photos. Someone even marked one of my airshow photos as a favorite! So cool!

So much done!

I can't believe how much Mom and I were able to complete in 5 hours!

I left work just before 1:30 and was in Waldorf in less than an hour. Traffic was pretty light. Mom and I met at the Mall and began our adventure. First, we stopped at Lane Bryant and did a little shopping. Mom bought me 2 capris, something I've never worn before, 2 new tops, 2 new bras and 5 pairs of underpants. Mom bought herself a top as well. You won't believe what the total came to... $300!!! Yeah, and we bought everything on sale, except for the capris. Day-um!

After Lane Bryant, we ate a late lunch an then went to Claire's. There, we got some earrings, headband, and necklaces. Not too bad. Then, we went shoe shopping and I got two new pairs of shoes and mom bought a pair for herself. Now, while we were at the she store, Mom realized that the Lane Bryant bag was missing! $300 worth of clothes gone! During this realization, I was feeding Amelia so I tell Mom t go retrace our steps to find the bag while I finish feeding Amelia. Mom finds the bag at Claire's. Whew! Once the bag was found, Mom went into Old Navy to look for a dress for Amelia to wear at the funeral and to my surprise, and hers as well, she was able to find a cute dress for $8! Way to go Mom!

After Old Navy, we were done and head out to the viewing. While on the way there, I call Cousin April to see if she was going as well and we chat it up for a few. Once Mom and I arrive at the viewing, Amelia was the most popular person there and she was hamming it up to! She was all smiles for everyone and talking away! So many people held her and she didn't even cry and get fussy. I was so happy too. Mom caught up with the Huntt side of the family while I played with Amelia. Not too long after we arrived, April arrives and we hang out for a bit. I went up to Uncle Pats casket and it was too weird looking at him. He looked like my Poppop except he had white hair while Poppop still had dark brown. My Poppop died when I was in the 6th grade, so roughly 15 years ago this past April. It was just weird.

After the viewing, Mom and I went and got our hair done and cut. The lady that did my hair went a little too short! The hair doesn't even touch my shoulders anymore. But, I kinda like it. My curls come out so it kinda looks good. Mom says she loves it. Can't wait until tomorrow to see what everyone else thinks. After the hair cuts, we ran into Safeway to get a few things. While I was in there, I took a picture of me with my camera phone and sent it to Greg's email. Later, I called Greg and told him to check his email because I wanted to know what he thought and the first word out of his mouth was 'Wow" and I asked if that was a good wow or a bad wow and he said good. Just wait until he see's it tomorrow when I get home.

Well, I never did get my letter from HR telling me what my hourly rate is. But, from what I was told, the salary they quoted me is correct, but the letter has to ay the hourly rate due to my position. And, tomorrow is finally payday! I can't wait to see what the check is going to be. Also, I really hope the direct deposit was completed before payday. I never understood why employers tell me it may take 4-6 weeks to complete a direct deposit set up when Office Team did it in less than a week! Bah, humbug!

Anyway, it's almost midnight and I am finally starting to feel tired.

Bedtime!

Whacked

My brain is causing things to be whacked for me.

I am feeling so alone right now for no real reason and I hate this.

So many random thoughts went through my mind on my way home. One thought was if I named Amelia the right name. My mom was so adamant about the name Natalie. I just don't like the name. Then, one day while I was at work, I received a phone call from a customer in Massachusetts and her name was Amelia and that is when I decided on a name. I was toying with the name of Evelyn as well. I have a thing for the old timey names. Amelia's middle name was something Greg and I agreed on because it sounded right; Amelia Margaret Frye. I still can't believe that I named a person. Does the name suit her? Will she like it when she's older? There is so much unknown...

After work I went over to Greg's work. I ended up hanging out for nearly two hours. We talked about a certain someone and stuff. I have something bothering me and I don't know why. In a sort, it feels like there is some competition; although I am not competing for or with anything. So frustrating! I tried to explain this to Greg and he's passive about it. He doesn't understand, yet frankly I don't understand why I am feeling this myself and it's bothering me on the inside.

Greg thinks I am feeling the way I am because there is so much 'unknown' going on with us. We don't know where we're going to be living come July, I don't know how much I am making any more since there was an 'error' on my proposal letter from HR and they haven't sent me a new letter, I don't know how much my first check is going to be, I don't know when Adam is going to mail the divorce papers, ect.

There is too much stuff going on and this recent death in the family just made things worse. And, I want Greg to be with me but we don't think he'll be able to do so because this is Labor Day weekend and five people have already taken this Friday off. I just want him to hold my hand during the funeral. But, at the same time I feel like I am being selfish by wanting him with me when He could be working and earning more money for us. He says I am not being selfish for wanting him to be there for me, even though he's never met this person. I don't know.

Work is being really nice about all this time off. My supervisor said I could borrow time so I can have a full 80 hour paycheck. I am still in my probation period and am not allowed to use my vacation, personal, or floating holidays yet. Sp. tjat os nice of them.

Welcome Greg!

Greg has finally started his own blogs!

The links are to the right.

It's funny, after Greg told me he created the blog accounts he sent me an email stating that this, blogging, can be and is very addicting! Little does he know...

Greg and I also discussed starting a new blog about Amelia and tracking all her growth and development. So, keep an eye out for that new blog.